1. Love’s a long shot, worry about what really matters.

    There are moments in life when it’s just too quiet. Like late at night or early in the morning. You just sit down and think what you’ve been denying to think. That is when, you know there’s something lacking in your life. You just know it.

    For some people, dealing with lacking means “I gotta have it right away”, for other it simply means that you have to think why is it missing from your life in the first place and what you need to do so you won’t have the same loss in the future. Everybody lies, they said things they don’t mean. But sometimes it takes a good fall to really know where you stand. 

    Let’s talk about love. 

    Everybody wants eternal love. and here is an idea :

    Forever is a long, long time and this tiny bastard called time has a way of changing things.

    Not everybody agrees to the fact that we need to put a label on things. But I do know that everybody, everybody just worried about the consistency. Not necessarily in term of the communication but the certainty that when you wake up in the morning, you and the other party won’t feel differently. 

    worrying is stupid. It’s like walking around with umbrella waiting for the rain. -Wiz Khalifa

    A friend of mine asked me this morning “why you don’t want to get married?”. It’s not true. Things just don’t work out that way in my life. Maybe I am just not the biggest fan of marriage, right now.. 

    Everyone needs reason why things are the way they are. But musing the reason gets you hanging onto the past, when what you can do is just moving forward, focusing on greater things and not knowing what’s gonna happen next in your life. Life is corny, but it’s full of surprises.

    True love can’t be defined by any means. It’s cluster of adjectives: crazy, passionate, complicated, painful but most importantly when you do have it, you just do. I’m not sure if I ever feel that way about somebody, but nearly there…maybe. Love isn’t about finding someone you can escape reality with. Life is too real, bitch. It’s about finding someone who makes reality worthwhile.

    I could fill a thousand pages telling you how I felt. As for now, I’ll just leave my past without a sound. Crying will be the last thing I do. Except that my heart shattering as it hits the ground at times. I just pray it’ll be the best decision for two of us. “You broke my heart, Rizal. I’m not going to hold you back anymore this time. Missing you is a thing, but exhausted is the thing.”

    Here I am, standing up for my self. Life taught me free lessons of dealing with the pain every day :) so, I’m cool. hehe..

    I have great friends, great classmates, great family, great show of how guys sugar coating? hahaha .. Among them, there are that kinda guys who see girl with pure affection, also guys who sees girl with their “corn neck”. hahaha..

    Take your time.. you’ll appreciate the actions of doing so :)